Today was Jack's first day of school. The first day ever. This is a huge step. Five and a half years he's been all mine. My days have revolved around his wants, his needs - putting all of my wants and needs on the sidelines. And just like that I am supposed to let go. Let him grow up. Let him learn how to fend for himself. It's a tough pill to swallow.
I think the anticipation of this day is a lot harder than the real deal. I had butterflies all morning. Jack was just ecstatic. He ate the infamous cinnamon and caramel rolls for breakfast. Took a shower. Brushed his teeth. Got dressed. I pinned his bus number on him. Handed him his backpack and we went outside to take pictures. When we heard the bus coming he started jumping up and down. I had a huge lump in my throat. Once Jack stepped onto that school bus, Finn went apeshit. He wanted to go to Kindergarten with his brother. I got Jack to turn around for me for one last picture.
The bus driver told him where to sit, noted his name and name tag, and just like that the doors closed and off the bus went.
Once the bus left, I picked Finn up and got all teary eyed with him. My neighbor said wow you did so great, I cried a ton when my oldest went to school. I had to hold in my tears otherwise I was just about to lose it. When we got inside Tom gave me a big hug and that just set me off. He's just gone. For 7 hours. How did this happen? They were bittersweet tears. I'm so proud of Jack. I'm so excited for Jack. I'm so sad that he's growing up. I'm so happy I only have two kids all day. I just am still so overwhelmed.
But today has been a great day so far. I pray that Jack gets off the bus with a smile so big it makes me burst into tears even more. I hope that he's even more excited to go back to school tomorrow. The sky's the limit big guy.
