Not Why Me

Did anyone read the cover story in the Star Tribune today? The one about the 6 year old, Annika? I would attach the link - but apparently it's not online, you can only read it in the real paper. This family's house was destroyed by that tornado in Hugo, MN last year and their 2 year old son died and their 5 year old daughter was left with brain damage. These parents are not giving up on their daughter, despite what all of the doctor's might tell them. They have had to deal with this while grieving the loss of their son who was taken way too early. I can't even imagine. When I was reading this article two things came to my mind.

The first one is the phrase "why me" - the parents in this article talked about how they can't sit and dwell on the "why me" and I completely agree with that. In my 25 years of life I've really never had to deal with any sort of tragedy. Well that is until 3 weeks ago. I'm surprised that I haven't been more upset with God - but really He is the one who is getting me through this entire experience. There have been moments where I've asked Him - why us, why my family? Why Brendan? Why why why? But then I realize that is not going to do anything and it doesn't make me feel any better. I can't change the past. I know it's OK to be upset and confused, but I'm really trying to just stay positive.

That brings me to my second point. I am so thankful that my brother has a working mind right now. Growing up - when I would talk with my friends and we'd ask each other weird questions like what would be the worst thing that could happen to you? More often than not, someone would say becoming a quadriplegic. Having a fully functioning mind, but not being able to do things physically. Well now that this is happening to a loved one - I completely disagree. Sure Brendan might not be able to squeeze something, or run, or a lot of other things - but technology is so wonderful he will find ways to get certain things done - I know he will. Somewhere inside of him right now, there is that cheerful, laid back, fun loving Brendan we all know and love and I know it's going to shine once again. It's hard to admit that 3 weeks ago when this accident took place I was almost wishing he was brain dead or something so that he wouldn't have to deal with all of the things he is dealing with right now. I am so glad that wasn't the case because even though Bren is in a little bit of a slump right now - there are moments when I know it's him inside there and that he's going to fight through this.

So I will leave you with this picture in hopes that someday soon we can all see that gorgeous smile again! Safe travels to Colorado tomorrow brother :-)