I was so excited for this week to start. Over the weekend, I got a membership to Lifetime. It took me a good 2-3 weeks to actually make this decision. This is good for me, usually when I come to a decision on something, I act on it. So taking the time to think this through, weigh the pros and cons was huge for me. Tom and I went in yesterday and signed me up. I was a little apprehensive about how the boys would do in the Kids Area, but Jack has been doing so great with ECFE and separating I thought he'd really have fun. Plus with his brother there, I figured that would ease his nerves. I decided my first day, I would just do a quick workout. I figured it would be better if they paged me when I was on an elliptical vs in an actual class.
So this morning we woke up and ate breakfast. We talked about where we were going and what we would be doing. We got to Lifetime and in the kids area and Finn was off, running around, playing with everything and everyone in sight. Jack started screaming bloody murder immediately. Saying he wanted to go home, etc. I told the worker it was our first time and he should hopefully calm down. So I left. I got to the locker room and started to put on my running shoes on when I realized I grabbed two different shoes. You've GOT to be kidding me. Luckily, there was a right shoe and left shoe, so I just wore two completely different shoes. One was blue and one was silver. I hopped on the elliptical sans music just in case they paged me over the intercom. Five minutes into my workout, my name was being called over the speaker. Great. So I headed upstairs and saw that Jack was inconsolable. I sat with him for a little bit and then was told that parents are not allowed in the play area for more than 5 minutes. So after realizing Jack was not going to let me leave, we just packed up and headed home.
Unless you have gone through this before I really can't explain how I feel about this situation. It's not that I'm embarrassed, or that I even feel bad leaving Jack while he's crying. I'm just so frustrated. I understand that it was his first time at a new place. But all of these emotions from when we had separating issues in 2009 are coming flooding back. I really thought we were past this. And it's not like I can't go to the gym at night or on weekends, it's just that the main reason for joining this club was to have something else to do during the days. To socialize the kids more. To do something for me for once. And it just blew up in my face.
I'm not giving up. We will go again this week. And I'll just sit in the locker room for the first 10 minutes waiting to get paged. And I will try and try again as many times as I can before I throw in the towel. I just need Jack to find something he likes to do there or for one teacher to help calm him down. Because it will just take one good time for him to get over this and realize how much fun it is there. I'm just worried it's going to be extremely challenging and take a long time.
To top off my day, my iPhone just fell in the toilet. Perfect. And no, Jack wasn't playing with it. It was all my fault.
I'd love some suggestions on separating from kids. Jack doesn't really have any comfort items like a blanket or nuk or anything. So that is out of the question. Next on my list: bribery.
Molly, I cannot even say that I understand. But I can tell you Congrats on not giving up, it will pass and he will be fine someday, but who knows when. Landon had some seperation issues but nothing to any extreme level. Just tell Jack that this is "Mommy's Time" and that he and Finn need to have "Their Time" I would def. use bribery (we have) No shame in using something that will work in the long run! Good luck and just hang in there. He will totally pass this phase again.
ReplyDeleteoh man, that is such a bummer. especially when you are trying to work out, do something for yourself (which you 100% deserve). I feel that we have been very blessed with kids who, like Finn, just run off and don't even care if we leave (or at least cry for a min and then are fine). But we have left them at such an early age for periods of time, so i don't know if that has anything to do with it. I would say don't give up! Megan said something great that it is "mommy time". Can you find out if he can bring a toy that is his in the play room or a snack and start him with that? Or tell him that you will give him a snack when you get back after a while...I don't know. Wish I could help more. Just don't give up! Giving in (you had no choice but to leave today) probably will make it worse, but you also have to judge your kids and what they can handle. It will be fine! I hope and pray the next time will go better!
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